Best way to get your girlish figure back

Catch gastroenteritis, fondly known as "kiddie crud" and you will be guaranteed to drop at least 5 pounds in 24 hours. In addition to that, you can have your choice of a low grade fever, chills, mental fatigue and overwhelming weakness. You may also have the desire to hug the cool porcelain of your nearest toilet bowl.

I, DrDrama, being on my deathbed of sound mind, do leave my entire shoe and jewelry collection to the Kid and my Jeep to my dear husband.

Apparently, I don't do illness well...